Friday, September 2, 2011

Update

Life has been crazy busy. I am working a lot and when I am not working- I am working on stuff for Alaska or trying to squeeze in as much time with family and friends before the move. It has been insane. Still no job for me or a place to live up there. We are moving in less than 3 weeks! We'll have a week on the road before we get there but not knowing where we are living yet is tough for me. I find myself checking every AK housing website everyday (sometimes several times a day). We are so blessed to have help from 2 families in Alaska so I am hoping and praying we will know soon. The good thing about being so busy is that I have not had time to stress about the infertility. So in that area of my life I have been doing okay. Well that is until I check facebook and see all the pregnancy statuses or get asked "You're married and great with kids- why don't you have any yet?" I spare most people the details and just tell them we've been trying. That is such a tough question because I even find myself asking that question. Not in the same manner that others are asking. They are just curious and want any answer. I walk away with tears in my eyes because I want the real answer. I want to know why my body hates me and causes me so much physical and emotional pain. I want to know if I'll ever be able to have kids. But right now I don't have an answer and its tough. But I just have to have faith that God's plans are bigger and better than mine. Who would have thought years ago when Ry and I got married that in the first 5 years we'd live on both coasts (Virginia and Alaska). I believe that God is going to do big things in our lives if we let Him. This infertility is preparing me for what He has next. I hope that in five years we'll be able to look back with amazement at the journey God has taken us on.

2 comments:

  1. Hey I was told you prob wont find anything on the web. You will have alot more luck finding something when you are there. For some reason they dont post as much as other places. I am excited for you and a bit jealous too. Sorry I havent talked to you lately I have been trying to get ready for school that starts next week. :-) Let me know how your trip goes.

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  2. Its okay. I've missed talking to you though. I hope you have an awesome school year.
    It is weird that they don't post stuff on the web as much as the lower 48.
    Any news on if you guys will move up there

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